Too Deep For My Own Good

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Some women want to be house wives and some women want to be Harvard professors and some women want to be porn stars and some women want to be nuns and some women want to be surgeons and there is nothing wrong with anyone’s profession I am sick of people being rude to women about their professions oh my god

(via thesound-and-thefury)

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Gaston really is the most terrifying Disney villain because he could be anyone in the world.

Later he convinces the whole town to set up his wedding with the knowledge that the would-be bride would be thrown into it. Everyone finds his creepy-ass tactics as cute and “boys will be boys” esque. So yeah, he is terrifying.

Yeah, the truly scary thing about Beauty and the Beast isn’t that Gaston exists, but that society fucking loves him. People who deride the movie by saying it’s about Stockholm Syndrome are ignoring that it’s actually about the various ways that truly decent people get othered by society. People don’t trust the Beast because of the way he looks, which only feeds his anger issues and pushes him further away. Gaston isn’t the only one who criticizes Belle for being bookish, either; the whole town says there must be something wrong with her. And her father gets carted off to a mental asylum for being just a little eccentric.

Howard Ashman, who collaborated on the film’s score and had a huge influence on the movie’s story and themes, was a gay man who died of AIDS shortly after work on the film was completed. If you watch the film with that in mind, the message of it becomes clear. Gaston demonstrates that bullies are rewarded and beloved by society as long as they possess a certain set of characteristics, while nice people who don’t are ostracized. The love story between Belle and the Beast is about them finding solace in each other after society rejects them both.

Notice how the Beast reacts when the whole town comes for him. He’s not angry, he’s sad. He’s tired. And he almost gives up because he has nothing to live for. But then he sees that Belle has come back for him, and suddenly he does. In the original fairy tale, the Beast asks Belle to marry him every night, and the spell is broken when she accepts. In the Disney movie, he waits for her to love him, because he cannot love himself. That’s how badly being ostracized from society and told that you’re a monster all your life can fuck with your head and make you stop seeing yourself as human.

Society rewards the bullies because we’ve been brought up to believe that their victims don’t belong. That if someone doesn’t fit in, then they have to be put in their place, or destroyed. And this movie demonstrates that this line of thinking is wrong. It’s so much deeper than a standard “be yourself” message, and that’s why it’s one of my favorite Disney movies.

(Source: thomasfinchmackee, via maliksmiles)

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Luftrausers, Nazis, and the Perpetual Shame Game

Sure, this may be about games, but this article is about so much more, and what it says about perspectives, interpretations of work and their ability to offend, and how we should respond to those reactions and interpretations are all heavily universal to other fields. This is a really good article.

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"The United States Government is offering you a piece of land of your own."

"We have our own land."

"No, it’s not yours. It’s the US Government’s."

— S1E6, “Pride, Pomp and Circumstance

Once you understand the criminal behavior of white people and their offspring then you can put in perspective gentrification and genocide of the copper color American Indian

Like they say in my country ” it’s really disrespectful to gain weight when you still owe me money.”

(Source: teacuphumans, via thesound-and-thefury)

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When I was seventeen and preparing to leave for university, my mother’s only brother saw fit to give me some advice.
“Just don’t be an idiot, kid,” he told me, “and don’t ever forget that boys and girls can never just be friends.”
I laughed and answered, “I’m not too worried. And I don’t really think all guys are like that.”

When I was eighteen and the third annual advent of the common cold was rolling through residence like a pestilent fog, a friend texted me asking if there was anything he could do to help.
I told him that if he could bring me up some vitamin water that would be great, if it wasn’t too much trouble.
That semester I learned that human skin cells replace themselves every three to five weeks. I hoped that in a month, maybe I’d stop feeling the echoes of his touch; maybe my new skin would feel cleaner.
It didn’t. But I stood by what I said. Not all guys are like that.

When I was nineteen and my roommate decided the only way to celebrate the end of midterms was to get wasted at a club, I humoured her.
Four drinks, countless leers and five hands up my skirt later, I informed her I was ready to leave.
“I get why you’re upset,” she told me on the walk home, “but you have to tolerate that sort of thing if you want to have any fun. And really, not all guys are like that.”

(Age nineteen also saw me propositioned for casual sex by no fewer than three different male friends, and while I still believe that guys and girls can indeed be just friends, I was beginning to see my uncle’s point.)

When I was twenty and a stranger that started chatting to me in my usual cafe asked if he could walk with me (since we were going the same way and all), I accepted.
Before we’d even made it three blocks he was pulling me into an alleyway and trying to put his hands up my shirt. “You were staring,” he laughed when I asked what the fuck he was doing (I wasn’t), “I’m just taking pity.”
But not all guys are like that.

I am twenty one and a few days ago a friend and I were walking down the street. A car drove by with the windows down, and a young man stuck his head out and whistled as they passed. I ignored it, carrying on with the conversation.
My friend did not. “Did you know those people?” He asked.
“Not at all,” I answered.
Later when we sat down to eat he got this thoughtful look on his face. When I asked what was wrong he said, “You know not all guys do that kind of thing, right? We’re not all like that.”
As if he were imparting some great profound truth I’d never realized before. My entire life has been turned around, because now I’ve been enlightened: not all guys are like that.

No. Not all guys are. But enough are. Enough that I am uncomfortable when a man sits next to me on the bus. Enough that I will cross to the other side of the street if I see a pack of guys coming my way. Enough that even fleeting eye contact with a male stranger makes my insides crawl with unease. Enough that I cannot feel safe alone in a room with some of my male friends, even ones I’ve known for years. Enough that when I go out past dark for chips or milk or toilet paper, I carry a knife, I wear a coat that obscures my figure, I mimic a man’s gait. Enough that three years later I keep the story of that day to myself, when the only thing that saved me from being raped was a right hook to the jaw and a threat to scream in a crowded dorm, because I know what the response will be.

I live my life with the everburning anxiety that someone is going to put their hands on me regardless of my feelings on the matter, and I’m not going to be able to stop them. I live with the knowledge that statistically one in three women have experienced a sexual assault, but even a number like that can’t be trusted when we are harassed into silence. I live with the learned instinct, the ingrained compulsion to keep my mouth shut to jeers and catcalls, to swallow my anger at lewd suggestions and crude gestures, to put up my walls against insults and threats. I live in an environment that necessitates armouring myself against it just to get through a day peacefully, and I now view that as normal. I have adapted to extreme circumstances and am told to treat it as baseline. I carry this fear close to my heart, rooted into my bones, and I do so to keep myself unharmed.

So you can tell me that not all guys are like that, and you’d even be right, but that isn’t the issue anymore. My problem is not that I’m unaware of the fact that some guys are perfectly civil, decent, kind—my problem is simply this:

In a world where this cynical overcaution is the only thing that ensures my safety, I’m no longer willing to take the risk.

r.d. (via vonmoire)

(Source: elferinge, via aboutmaleprivilege)

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if u have a dick u dont get an opinion about feminism.

do i even need to point out how cissexist, transmisogynistic, and wrong this statement is

ur username is “cumaddict” don’t even talk to me

yes i love cum i drink it…

EXACTLY. Sure, not all of us have expertise or knowledge of feminism (I, a cisgendered male, will admit that I am no expert on social justice or feminist theory), but that doesn’t mean we aren’t allies. Feminism is defined as “the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities”. This makes a lot of people, with a specific genitalia or not, feminists. Just because we are not a part of the oppressed community or may not study much feminist theory, does not mean we are still not in support and advocation of feminism.

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it’s weird how bra commercials are more aimed towards straight male audiences more than the audience that’s actually gonna buy a fuckn bra

I could be wrong, but isn’t it really about showing women what their bras will make you look like? It’s a subliminal-ish message that attractive people use their product, so if you do, you’re attractive. Male underwear models/commercials do the same thing, as do “beauty” products, like make up or shampoo commercials.

(via aboutmaleprivilege)

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I had an interesting experience today. I went to Flat Tail for dinner with my family to celebrate my dad’s birthday. Recently, I’ve definitely been checking people out a lot (even though it’s probably perfectly normal, especially being a single college student and all), and today I had a really cute waiter. I think he was a little ginger, but he had dirty blond hair and pretty blue green eyes.

Of course, I did what I always tend to do, and told a friend about this cute waiter. His response? “Leave your number.” Now, this is something I have actually seen someone do (though, unfortunately, it didn’t work out for them), but would never have considered doing it myself. Probably partially a case of nerves, but as a queer man, in this case flirting with another man who’s sexual orientation I had no knowledge of, I was very hesitant to do this.

As it turns out, I didn’t have a pen, and neither did my mom (who, being the person there with a purse, was who I would have relied on for a pen). So I didn’t give this guy my number, and really couldn’t at this point. Yet, I’m still kind of regretting not saying something.

I often like to think “what’s the worst that could happen?” when taking risks. I’m really good at giving this advice to friends and supporting them, but showing a mix of nerves and indecisiveness when it’s my turn. But it’s solid advice I should have followed better here (like maybe using the pen for signing the receipt? Though, admittedly, doing this at dinner with my parents may still not have been appropriate).

I regret not doing anything, even when I really couldn’t. And it’s making me better understand the need to take these risks, even as a queer man. There is someone out there who will love me and comfort me and fill a desire in my heart for intimacy. There’s no way I’m going to find that if I don’t take these risks, especially if I just assume all men are straight and don’t take the chances with them. If I never did, I would always just regret not saying something. And that’s a haunting feeling sometimes.

I’m sure this guy was probably not “The One”, and he probably was not queer (my mom didn’t seen to think so), but how would I have known unless I took that risk? Hopefully I’ll learn from this and continue to follow this self-advice, rather than reverting to a shy guy who doesn’t put himself out there because he worries so much. If my past relationships taught me anything, sometimes love comes in unexpected places.